Sunday, May 22, 2011

Private...

I have struggled for months with making this blog private...not because I really need to, but because sometimes I hate that people read my private thoughts and could possibly know what I feel..

Now I know that this seems absolutely absurd, because you know, no one has forced me to start this blog...but the truth is the truth...

The truth of the matter is that I need this blog...I firmly believe that if I continue to stand in front of young people, and expect them to allow me to help them, I have to not worry about what people think when I tell them I shed a tear or two, or that I got my feelings hurt..

It has become so much easier for me to pretend that I don't get sad, or you can't hurt my feelings, or you get the picture, but again, that's not the truth!!

The great part is that I LOVE writing! If you give me a pen and a paper, (or a laptop) I can tell you exactly how I feel..I struggle with openly showing my emotions to people in my life who love and care about me! Crazy girl I know!

So...I've said all of this to say that I'm not going to make this blog private, and that I am trying so hard to not be so closed off emotionally... Ministry is being transparent, and I want to truly help those who need my story so they know they are not alone!!

So...if by chance you read this..which is like two people..lol, know that I'm working on it!!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

2 comments:

The Ross' said...

well if you do...i'd love to keep following! I totally get what your saying...you have no idea how many blogs I've written and then...delete, delete, delete...because i feel they are too vulnerable/raw. Afterwards, I feel better for writing them, posting them or not. For me, its really about the processing. At times I toss them in my journal instead of hitting publish. I enjoy when you write and really share. Its encouraging and helps me realize that i'm normal too. :-)

Manjusha said...

I understand how you feel. I struggled with keeping old content on the new remodel of my blog for fear of judgement. I finally let go of that with realizing that those that I'm really trying to reach will benefit from seeing my growth.

It's awesome that you are taking the step to be that strong. Keep it up, Sis!